Dear Diary, 

Me again. Sorry I haven’t written in a while. The last few weeks seem to be a bit of a haze. As I told you last time I wrote, I was going to go home to my beloved Isle to be with Mum, just for a long weekend. All the event work in London had dried up so what could four days away hurt? 

So I booked the flights, but then had to think about where to sleep. Mum is 78, so all my beloved friends had offered to house me, but I started to get anxious. Began to feel like a bit of a leper to be honest. London has a third of the whole of the UK’s Corona cases. It felt almost irresponsible to leave and potentially spread it further afield – and at that time, my darling Isle was Corona free… 

Three Air BnB’s came back to me, ALL saying they were now using the properties to self-isolate someone, and then came another big blow. The Manx Government announced that anyone travelling to the island had to self-isolate for 14 days. I couldn’t find anywhere to sleep for three days, never mind 14, and what a burden I would be if I had to stay indoors for that long! It could also cost a fortune! The lack of accommodation, the risk of ME being the one to give Corona to my beloved Isle – the cracks in my plan were starting to show…

In the end, ever so sadly, I cancelled my flight. Since then, the doors to my cherished home have closed shut. It kind of hasn’t sunk in really. I left the Island in 2002, but you know I always pop back, to see family and friends. It will always be home, where I am truly me. But for the first time in my life, I can’t go, be surrounded by familiarity, climb a hill and scream into the wind, or hug Mum. Closing the doors is the best thing for my beloved Isle, but the worst thing for me. 

Instagram posts from friends show blustery walks with pooches, eating ice cream in scarves, and windswept scenes I know like the back of my hand. It’s painful, but beautiful to see her being so well taken care of, and appreciated. For now, we must spend time apart dear Isle, for both our sakes. When will we meet again I wonder? When we do I’m going to embrace you like never before and give back to you as much as you have given to me.  

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