AQUARIUS (JAN 20 – FEB 18) 

Avoid disappointment by keeping your expectations very low this week. 

PISCES (FEB 19- MAR 20) 

Over your ex? Think again. 

ARIES (MAR 21- APR 19) 

Don’t let anyone tell you that avoidance isn’t a good coping strategy. 

TAURUS (APR 20- MAY 20) 

A dreadful hangover is in your future. You can’t avoid it. Just accept it. 

GEMINI (MAY 21- JUN 21) 

Worried about your future? The world is literally burning. It’s a valid concern.  

CANCER (JUN 22 – JUL  22) 

You should tell that person how you really feel about them. What’s the worst that can happen? Total humiliation? 

LEO (JUL 23 – AUG 22)

Not to make any statements about your love life, but get used to being alone. 

VIRGO (AUG 23- SEPT 22) 

Everyone talks about the importance of opening up and being vulnerable. But sometimes, being emotionally repressed is a lot better than crying on some random girl in a club. Think about that this week. 

LIBRA (SEPT 23- OCT 22) 

There’s always a possibility of being fired, but this week, if you try just that little bit harder, you can succeed in getting fired. 

SCORPIO (OCT 23-NOV 22) 

An apple a day might keep the doctor away, but to mitigate this week’s alcohol intake, you need to be averaging on 15 apples a day. 

SAGITTARIUS (NOV 23 – DEC 21) 

It’s time to assess whether you’re watching too many TikToks at your big age. 

CAPRICORN  (DEC 22- JAN 19) 

You are where you need to be right now. Sorry if you’re in Foxdale. That’s rough. 

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