AQUARIUS (JAN 20 – FEB 18)
Don’t dwell on old mistakes. Dwell on the mistakes you’ll make at the Christmas party.
PISCES (FEB 19- MAR 20)
When something in life gets difficult, it’s easy to give up. Make life easy for yourself.
ARIES (MAR 21- APR 19)
Ever wanted to snog your boss? The Christmas party is the perfect time to cause a headache for HR.
TAURUS (APR 20- MAY 20)
Slut-dropping is always a crowd pleaser at a Christmas party
GEMINI (MAY 21- JUN 21)
Filming other people’s mistakes during a Christmas party is morally wrong, but it could make very good blackmail material (also wrong).
CANCER (JUN 22 – JUL 22)
Need therapy? Choose the cheaper option of getting very drunk at the Christmas party and telling the intern your life story.
LEO (JUL 23 – AUG 22)
If you hear that your Christmas party has been cancelled: it hasn’t been. You’ve just been uninvited.
VIRGO (AUG 23- SEPT 22)
STAY IN YOUR LANE.
LIBRA (SEPT 23- OCT 22)
Remember the true meaning of Black Eye Friday by getting absolutely bladdered.
SCORPIO (OCT 23-NOV 22)
Feeling like you’ve had a lot of disappointment recently? Just wait until Christmas.
SAGITTARIUS (NOV 23 – DEC 21)
Perhaps it’s time to give up and give in and start wearing crocs.
CAPRICORN (DEC 22- JAN 19)
No one knows that your ugly Christmas jumper is ironic if you dress in ugly clothes all the time.