Gef’s Christmas Tynwald Preview

O come all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant, come ye, o come ye, to Tynwald’s December sitting.

Yes the bleakest of all the school nativity plays is here and there is much to do before headteacher Laurence Skelly dismisses the class for Christmas.

This year’s show will begin, as is tradition, with questions and as ever, star pupil Jason Moorhouse will lead the way, asking eight of the 16 questions before the sixth form debating society.

Mr Moorhouse will begin by asking Head Boy Alf Cannan and DoI Minister Chris ‘Cringle’ Thomas about repairs to the school driveways, namely the section around the Fairy Bridge.

Member for Garff Daphne Caine will be attempting to bring some seriousness to proceedings as she asks Dr Ebenezer Allinson about support for Laxey Glen Mills, which lost its best customer earlier this year when the bakery closed its doors.

Next up will be ‘Tiny’ Tim, sorry Mr Glover, who will be asking what support there is for people coming off benefits and starting a new job.

Keeping with the theme of benefits and jobs, Mr Moorhouse will be asking about when financial support available to a jobseeker ends, following confirmation that they have found work and how many new graduates the Government has employed in the last three years; and how many have benefited from external training schemes.

He will then turn his eye to Education Minister Julie Edge, asking what progress has been made into the funding review for her department. Tiny Tim will also be asking Ms Edge who has responsibility for behaviour policies in schools.

Elsewhere we have questions about the future of the Casltemona from David Ashford, a health ombudsman from Speaker Juan Watterson and smart meters.

We also have an inkling into what Mr Ashford has on his Christmas list this year, as he asks about the use of e-scooters.

Mr Watterson will wrap up the opening act by asking about changes to employee contracts at the Steam Packet.

Interval

As ever, the staff will be coming round with ice cream and the bar will be open for snacks and beverages.

There will just be time for one Christmas joke this year and here it is:

‘Why does Alf insist Rob Callister play Father Christmas?’
‘Because he loves giving him the sack’ (cue laughter).

Second Half

After the interval, Dr Allinson will be letting us know if Jacob Marley has visited him during his lunchtime nap as he makes a financial statement. Here’s hoping the ghost of Christmas yet to come gets round to him before he wakes up.

From there we have a report into the meat plant, where members will be asked to swear allegiance to the meat plant and tell CoMin to get on with transferring it to the Treasury.

There are also a couple of appointments to finalise, including (redacted) being confirmed as the information commissioners for another five years.

Yes it’s a cheap joke, but then it is Christmas, we wish Ian McDonald another good five years.

Mrs Caine has the most interesting motion on the order paper as she wants Tynwald to acknowledge the global biodiversity and ecological crisis and supports Biosphere Isle of Man’s vision for a sustainable future. It will be most interesting to see where this goes.

From there we have an important motion on the Domestic Abuse Act, which relates to travel notifications and the manner in which notifications are made.

The performance will wrap up with Enterprise/Health/Miss Universe Minister Lawrie Hooper seeking the go ahead for £10m of taxpayer cash to be spent on helping with the redevelopment of brownfield sites, a benefits boost from Dr Scrooge and more cash for the Energy Efficiency Scheme.

Once they’ve all finished, the cast will be available for pictures and autographs at the front door, where Mr Speaker will lead them in a rendition of I Wish it Could be Tynwald Everyday.