Gef’s Missing (No, Not Me)

We’d like to clarify something up front – we’re not missing. But a mongoose called Gef is. And frankly, we’re a little offended he’s stealing our thunder.

The mischievous yellow mongoose legged it from the Curraghs Wildlife Park just before TT and has since been popping up like a furry Houdini across the island – most recently a whopping 16 miles away on the outskirts of Douglas.

Gef (the mongoose, not us) was last seen on Monday afternoon darting across an industrial estate, as witnessed by a forklift driver who presumably wasn’t expecting a small African mammal to feature in his shift.

He told the park he saw the (missing) Gef cross the road, zip across the yard, and disappear behind a commercial unit – like something out of The Great Escape: Marsupial Edition.

This isn’t Gef’s (again, not me, try and keep up) first cameo either. He’s been spotted at another industrial estate and previously doing a bit of garden hopping in Union Mills.

Kathleen Graham, general manager at the Wildlife Park, said: ‘We were initially surprised at how far he had gone. But they do travel quite far in the wild to find new territory and a mate. We’ve nicknamed him Gef – what else are you going to call him?!’

Exactly, Kathleen. Respect.

Gef is one of two yellow mongoose pups born last September, and it turns out his escape was less accidental, more elaborate tunnel heist. Kathleen explained: ‘They dig naturally in the enclosure. It’s underwired to 2m, but he burrowed a very long tunnel from further back – so we didn’t spot it until he was already out living his best life.’

Apparently, mum and sister mongoose also had a go at a breakout, but weren’t quite as committed to the cause and ended up trying to sneak back in.

The keepers had been trying to trap the pups (humanely!) for a while to sex them and plan for their future. Gef, suspected to be male, seemed to get the hint – and legged it in search of love.

‘They’re smart and don’t like being trapped,’ said Kathleen. ‘We now know the other youngster is female – but Gef’s probably a boy, and it seems like he’s out there looking for a girlfriend.’

The park’s team is still checking traps daily in hopes of bringing him home safely. If successful, the plan is to pair him up with a nice lady mongoose in another zoo. Romance may not be dead after all.

And if this all sounds a bit familiar – yes, this isn’t the park’s first escape artist. In 2019, red panda Kush made headlines (and memes) after escaping twice in four months, only to be caught again in January 2020.

Honestly, someone needs to pitch this place to Netflix.

So to recap: we’re not lost, but Gef the mongoose is still on the run. And we can’t decide if we’re offended or proud.